41 Derbies

They meet again this Sunday
In the April Sun
At the fat ground, the Western Derby
And youse can tell the Vicko commentators
It’s a DERBY not a DARBY
And the scarfed mobs fill the trains early
40,000 spill in from all points of the city and beyond
Getting off at Leederville or Subi Station
It’s a handful of middies before the game
To get the vocals lubed
Ready to scream Ball in unison
To tell the umpire he needs a new optometrist
Or a new whistle, or that he’s the green maggot
This Derby the Purple look to bring the ledger closer
With the Big Birds still on top 21 to 19
When the siren sounds at 2.40 in the arvo
the rest of the teams cease to exist
hope for some biffo before the bounce
Or deep into the final stanza, a few points in it
A sea of Navy and Gold, of Purple and White
Because Melbourne is another planet
We’re a footy league of our own here in the West
In this House of Pain for one
Ballantyne’s got another day off
Unable to pester the packs
Can’t ever win a Ross Glendinning
Let’s shout up the Cross-town bragging rights
The North versus South Swan River rivals
As if a river could contain the thud of a Sherrin
The boot on leather for a helicopter torp
Remember the bruises of 2000: Round 21
The demolition derby, the fines the suspensions
The blood of this game
Now it’s a ruck battle, a melee at the centre bounce
Nic Nat vs Sandy for the tap out
May the most massive palm win it
Priddis gets it on the boot
A shock of Brownlow blonde
for a 60 metre
centimetre perfect bomb
to the goal square
it’ll probably be Fyfe to collect it
and bolt bounce it back up the corridor
this wonderful hatred
from Neesham V Malthouse
to Lyon V Simpson
From Woosha Vs Allan to Hurn V the Pav
Whatever the weather
its gonna rain loud love
On Sunday